This is the point where the dream shatters and leaves me pierced and pained with little bits and pieces of it. Again. See. That is why you should not hope. As much as I say that you should look at the world with bright, shiny eyes and nuture dreams in them like they are your very own babies, you should not. It's all crappy optimism that gets you nowhere. We need to get real. I need to get real. I need to stop dreaming. Especially the year-end dreaming. Bad bad time to dream. I don't learn from mistakes, do I. Only a miracle can do the wonder now. And no. They do not happen as often as you would like them to.

On another note. I pray that all in Mumbai are safe. The world is becoming deadlier by the day.

Perfection. Why is it unattainable? Why is it next to impossible? Why is it even a concept if it is so damn difficult to realize?

You know how life has all these pieces. The education piece. The family piece. The career piece. The interests piece. The money piece. The friends piece. The relationship piece. And the many other pieces. You can put in as many pieces as you want to. All the pieces that make your life look like what it does. Very much similar to a jigsaw puzzle. It seems to me that no matter how hard I try, there needs to be at least one piece missing. Usually more than one. But at least one. Sometimes I only have one piece and the many many other ones are no where to be seen. It's like someone is playing hide and seek with me and the pieces. I find one, and the other goes missing. And another is discovered. And two others disappear. And a bunch of them reappear miraculously from nowhere. An exhausting game this is. And I don't know how much longer I can handle it. I just hope that the referee knows when to call it a time out.

While the game has been draining me out, I have been weaving a dream off late. A dream that is too good to be true. A dream that should remain a dream coz I don't think my world has the potential to handle it in reality. A dream that is has gotten me all high in the sky, knowing that the fall from up above there will shatter me once again. A dream that I should probably throw into the garbage bin before it gets a chance to kick me into the trash instead. A dream that someone needs to slap me out of right here, right now.

There are some things that we can never learn. This is one of mine.

Live your dream.

Rock On. I liked the movie. Sensible, in the recent basket of utterly rotten ones. Young, fresh and alive. Besides the fact that I love Farhan, and watching him rock this movie has only increased the love ten fold.

Anyway. This is not about my love for Farhan or Rock On. This is about dreams. Dreaming the dreams. And living them. All those beautiful, bright and shiny dreams. The chase to realize them. The quest to reign them. The hunger to breathe them. And to finally live them, it is a wonderful feeling indeed. Almost surreal. Beyond imagination.

I dream. I dream and I wish. Wish for them to get real some day. Some dreams do come true. One of mine did a couple of months ago. A dream that I had dreamed for over a decade. I never thought it would. But it did. And there is nothing that can beat the overwhelming feeling of living your dream. Realizing the dream gave me hope. Hope that at the end of the day, life can turn out the way you want it to. Hope that the impossible can turn out to be possible at times. Hope that there is a light at the end of this dark tunnel. Hope that keeps me going.

So all you people. Dream. I know that when they shatter, it gets painful and breaking and killing. And that does happen every once in a while. But you'll never figure out the joys of being on top without having ever been down under. Trust me. It's worth it.

I took destiny in my hands today. After contemplating for hours and looking out for signs and and flipping coins and constantly wondering, I lay it down into my very own hands. And I am waiting to see what happens next. Touch wood.